Happy Thursday everyone! I hope you’re having a good day! Don’t worry guys I’m not saying goodbye to you or WordPress, it’s only the title of this post. I’ll be honest with you guys… I’m not having such a great day today. It’s partly my fault for not changing that. I’m glad tomorrow is finally Friday! It’s also the beginning of a three-day weekend for me since Monday is Labor Day. Today I’m in the mood to let out a good cry. Sometimes it feels good to cry after holding it in for so long. What’s funny is that it’s actually cloudy in El Paso today! We don’t get too many of those days here. Things at work aren’t going that smoothly today or to be honest these past few months.
I previously wrote about losing a best friend this year. Today is her birthday. She also moved to another state today. In a way I feel bad I haven’t said good luck or happy birthday to her. She is my Facebook friend but I know we aren’t best friends anymore. It still bothers me to this day even if it’s been almost a year since we last hung out. It may sound mean but I don’t really feel like saying happy birthday or good luck with your move to her on social media or via a text message.
I ran into her some months back. She said we would hang out before she moved and it was all bullshit. I think we both knew it was bullshit. She had time for others but not for me. She says I got mad at her because she went to nursing school. I wasn’t mad at her, in fact it was the opposite. I was happy she was making a good life for herself. I was happy she found a lifelong career instead of staying in sales. I got upset because she acted like she was now better than me. Her attitude and actions towards me completely changed. She wasn’t the same person I socialized with anymore. It’s unfortunate we went in separate directions in life…but in a way not really.
I guess it still hurts because we were so close for years. As much as you want to talk to someone or be their friend, it’s sometimes impossible to continue the friendship. Some friendships or relationships aren’t meant to be repaired. Some people aren’t meant to be in your life forever. I am just letting things happen from now on. I will always have the memories we shared in my mind. I remember a lot of them like they happened yesterday, even if most were months or years ago.
I remember this exact day last year celebrating her birthday at her favorite restaurant. I remember a lot of the advice she gave me. She is almost 50 so she has a wealth of experience and wisdom. I’m sure if she were in my shoes she would tell me to move on with my life and chase new beginnings. This is exactly what I plan on doing in terms of finding new friends and a new career. I’m glad to have found all of you here and to those who are still in my life today. I’m saying goodbye to her here. I’m closing the ‘book’ on our friendship. I’m putting the ‘book’ away on the ‘shelf’ for another happy or rainy day. I have to be thankful for the memories we have and that is what I will do. I will carry on and continue being me. I promise not to change for anything or anyone. Until next time everyone.