Hi everyone! I didn’t know if I should blog about it or not but I decided to after all. I’ve been pretty busy this weekend because I’m moving into my own place. Before I can move in completely, I still have some last minute things I need to take care of. I probably won’t move in completely until next weekend. If someone would’ve told me this year would end up the way it has so far, I wouldn’t believe it. I had hopes and dreams of being married this year. I thought me and him were building a life together but I guess not. It’s been a month since we last spoke. I moved out on January 24 so it’s almost been two months now. Even though my son will be with me, I haven’t been on my own since I was 21. At first I lived in an apartment with roommates in college. I then lived alone for about two years afterwards. I’m excited and nervous at the same time. I think it will be a good time to get to know myself again. Regardless, I’m going to make the best of it.
I realize I can’t force anyone to stay in my life, especially when they don’t want to be there. I know I wasn’t the perfect girlfriend but I can’t live and dwell in the past anymore. I have to continue moving forward with my life. I know good things are headed my way, whether I meet someone else or not. I’ll always have myself and that’s all that matters. I’m still hurt about the whole situation but I’m currently living in the present. I’ve been dating for a long time so I was ready to settle down for good. To be honest, I don’t think I can give it my all in a relationship anymore, especially right now. It hurts when you put in so much effort into a relationship and it doesn’t end up the way you wanted. The thing is, you can’t control anyone else’s life or feelings but your own. You can only cherish the people who want to stay in your life and forget the rest. I still don’t know what the future holds for me. I’m learning to go with the flow everyday instead of worrying and overthinking things like usual. A day at a time…a day at a time.